The Oakley massive news:
Will Vidler ever get his ped - the rumour remains!!!
Mitch the little year 8 is still grounded after several weeks of being locked up in his house!!! He managed to escape for a few valuable hours last Saturday and threatened to steal his mother's car. Nice one Mitch, keep up the good work!
Wig has also recently decided to copy Mitch's work and walked out on his parents on Saturday! He got in to an arguement and walked down to the park, and got seriously slaughted!!! RESPECT to the WIGSTER
Today (Tuesday 30th April) at approxmatly 6.00pm, Robin (the nutter), decided to show off his nuttyness! We were crusing around the 'Toys R Us' carpark, when I hear Robin shout back at me "watch this". OK I thought go ahead. Robin throttles it up to 40mph and is heading for the harshest speedbump known in Basingstoke! He leans back and takes off over the bump, flying through the air I could see the shit dripping down his trouser legs! Nice one Robin, whats next, the BMX track in Oakley???
Plums are taking over Oakley, many harsh plumming is being carried out between the alliance and the non-alliance! So boys next time your in Oakley and are standing up, take a look around and make sure somebody isn't about to crack you one in the bollox! Oh, and by the way, next time you see Graham Thompson, smack him one for me please, cheers!!!
Yesterday (3rd May) at about 10-50pm when I was leaving Oakley to go home and watch my weekly episode of Jackass, I had a disturbing surprise! My ped had been completly savaged and had been involved in a brutal attack... there was loads of post-its all over it (they included): 'cutdown on the pies', 'free the pens', 'I wipe my arse with your website', 'speedfight my arse', 'slow ped', '3-0', 'caught with your pants down', 'stoned', 'craddle snatcher', and 'keys are in boot'. I couldn't belive it, I had been completly had by some little batty ravers, not naming any names (Dave Holton, Brendan Vickery (whose brother robbed my ped - dick head) and possibly James Wade)!!! Watch your backs boys, I'll be watching you!!!
The Ped Crew has a new nutter:
Today Sunday 5th May Fidleybum joined the ped crew, when he got his new ped. He has been on the road for two days and has already crashed in to a car and has been pulled by the police - nice one Fidler! Oh yeah and he also drives like an arse! For example, today he took a Merc and waved a the driver!!! The ped is alright though, 60mph at 9500rpm, impressive - shame about the driver though!!!
The Ped Crew go go-karting:
On Monday 13th the ped crew went go-karting in Gosport!!! Me, Dave (and his Dad), Beaver, and Robin were racing each other at high speeds on a bad-arse track! To see the results and times have a look at the photos for the printouts. There were plentiful of skids, crashes and over-taking!!! If you fancy going, give me a ring and we will get a crew down to Gosport, because it is such a laugh!!!
Latest... The Ped Crew go professional - go-karting style!!! The Ped Crew are entering a professional race at Gosport against loads of different teams! The Prize - 1000 pound! The chance of us winning - f**k all!!!
Last Night (Friday 18th May) the Oakley Massive were chillin outside the shop when the police roll past, everybody takes no notice and they roll on by!! As they drive off Andy P. thought it was a good idea to shout 'f**k off' to them! They were back quicker than it takes Robin to get to Oakley and back! Two blokes get out the meat wagon and start looking at us!!! James makes up some excuse and gets busted for Andy's drunken disorderness!!!
The Ped Crew go for a McDonalds (Drive-thru style):
Yesterday Saturday 18th May, after going to Oakley me and Dave decided we were hungry and needed a McSanja. At 10-30 we went to McDonalds, but imagine how pissed off we were when it was closed. 'F**k it' lets go through the drive-thru. OK I say lets go. I get on the back off Dave's ped and we burn it through the drive-thru. 'One McSanja please' I say. The bloke looks at us weird and asks for the money. We were pissing ourselves laughing as I collecting the goods. After all that I made Dave wait outside McDonalds, while I take my time eating my McSanja!!! Nice one Dave.
Fidler loses a wingmirror on his travels - although I reckon he knocked it off, because he was leaning over the handlebars to much?
Yesterday (Wednesday 22nd May) I was taking my route home, crusing down Reading Road at 40mph, when I look behind me and the police are up my arse! They started flashing their lights at me, and I begin to fill my pants! I pull over and they drive past, leaving me on the side of the road filling my pants - cheers. Later... Me and Dave are crusing down the dual-carrageway when I started to smell burning on Dave's ped!!! We stopped at the crossroads and Dave's L-plate was glowing red and melting, because it was on fire - superb!!!
Today (Thursday 23rd May) I was on my way home in the rush hour when a huge traffic jam starts to pile up! S**t I thought I'm going to miss the Simpsons. When I get to the junction there has been a crash and oil is all over the road, but me being clever thought I could drive around it. As the policeman was waving me through I turn around the corner, skid in the oil and do a 180 degree turn, facing the way I had just come from. To make things worse as I skided I almost knocked the policeman over! He gives me an evil - f**k I thought, I'm about to be busted for almost hitting a policeman, bugger this I thought and I chipped before he could say anything.
After being beaten by Dave too many times down Pack Lane I decided it was about time I tuned up and modified my ped. I decided the best way was to bolt a Leo Vinci ZX Racing pipe on to it, and fix throttle rollers and clutch springs. After running it in, it is now working nicely, with a top speed of 55 mph and accelarating like shit of a spoon!!! Fancy a race anyone???
After treating Dave to a whole can of 'silly-string' G Mc Gee scores another point!!!
The competition is soon to come to an end... the first one to get to 10 points takes the glory of winning!!!
The Ped Crew are currently making a Jackass video, so far we have been doing some messed up stuff... like Human Tennis, and random egg throwings!!!
A few days ago Dave bought himself a shiny brand new tyre for his ped from Nick Robinson!!! But it only took him 48 hours to wreck it another that he now needs a new one. Oh well only another‚ 30 pound! Nice one Dave. I suppose you could buy yourself a pair of wingmirrors while your there?
Yesterday (15th June 2002) I was wondering why Mitch has enough time to waste, that he can leave pathetic messages on my website. Then I relised that I have not seen him for a few weeks. Then yesterday evening it came to my knowledge that he has been grounded again for a further two weeks!!! Yes, that's right, the little year 8 has been so bad that he is now going to be locked in his house so that he can't escape. Oh yeah and this time Mitch, don't try and steal your Mum's car!!!
Yesterday (the day when England got knocked out of the World Cup - harsh), Fidler got absolutly smashed out of his face! After throwing up several times Shane took his ped for a rinse around the street - and stacked it hard! After Shane had stacked it proper, Wig thought it was only fair if he had a go. We cruised in to town and away from the safe haven of Oakley, leaving Wig riding around roundabouts on Fidler's ped! After riding around town I pulled out in front of a police car and gave him a wave, and then a car touched Dave's knee as they reversed in McDonalds car park, Dave went around the side of the car and leaned in the window and had a go at them - respect goes out to Dave.
OK, picture this - Dave's riding along under the bridge in Oakley singing to himself and suddenly he realises that his ped is being a bit wierd, and being a little slow (nothing out the normal, I think!!!). Then after a few seconds his fcuking exhaust falls of!!!! The exhaust snapped of where it bends and he is left on the road with a top speed of 10mph and a ped that sounds like a chaimsaw injected with nos!!! He said that he didn't know what to do - ride at 10mph to the shop, sounding like a really loud chainsaw or to walk and look like a arse!!! Nice one Dave, looks like you might have to go for a Leo Vinci stylie! Fidler the second!!!
Wig has finally bought himself a ped!!! A Yamaha Neos, second hand, but brand new reg. and only a few miles on the clock!!! Bargain!!! Welcome to the ped crew Wig, not long to go now before your CBT and you can thrash it around hard (at 30mph)!!!
A few days ago Luke, Tig and Loz thought it would be a laugh to hot wire Fidler's ped!!! So, next time you see his ped leaning up against something, put your hand through the missing vent panel and pull out the white cable, then give it a kick and it will start... SUPERB!!!
Last week Jame's thought it would be a laugh to take a shit in one of those portable toilet's that the builder's use at Oakley school!!! Half way through his shit, the door flew open and the crew saw Jame's wiping his arse!!! NICE
A few days ago Doy was messing around with Fidler and others down the park, when Doy cracked Fidler on the nose and broke it sending him to hospital for stitches and an opperation. SAFE Doy!!!
Evidence that Fidler can't drive: After losing control of his ped and swerving to miss Amy Nad's, he drops his ped and adds a few more scratches to his near perfect paint job!!! Nice one Fidleybum keep up the good work!!!
Evidence that Fidler's a tit: After asking the women at the bank for 150 pound, she asks him "how would you like your money", Fidler replys "in cash please". Fidler you arse!!!
Jason has only been on the road for a few days and Sternez has stacked his ped already, cracking a few panels and tearing off his number plate, nice one bad boy!!!
JJ was crusing around in Oakley and being an arse like normal when he starts riding on the pavement. Under cover jump out of a passing car and bust his sorry arse!!! Harsh ones!!!
On my way to Oakley a car decides it would be a good idea to move in to the fast lane (where I was) with out looking!!! After he had hit my wingmirror I was squashed up against the kerb on the otherside of the dualcarrage way!!! He didn't see me at all, even when he hit me, so I thought the only thing I could do was to knock on his window while doing about 40mph, so I did, but he didn't see me!!! So, I beep my horn, and at last he sees me, he swerves out the way and looks like he had just shit himself!!! What a prick!
Yesterday night (12th July 2002), Beaver and Dave were riding around when they saw the rivel ped crew (consisting of three members)!!! They decided to race around town and after they had got their arses kicked they pulled over and waited for them!!! They got talking and before they knew it the rivel ped crews had united!!! The rivel ped crew has a Katanna, a Runner and A Yamaha DT125!!! Terry the Runner rider crusied down to Oakley with Beav to meet the massive - SAFE!!!
|
Help the campaign:
Help James, Luke and Wig, by going on to www.freethepens.20m.com, and freeing pens from banks, post offices and anywhere else you see pens being abused!!!
Have a look at the latest website from Robin Watkins (a wannabe thepedcrew.20m.com maybe), check it out at www.thepedboys.20m.com. And cheers for the pics Robin!! Nice jump!!!
Doy:
One of the many members of the Oakley massive!!! An all round nice guy, big up the Doymyster!!! Keep it real
Website advertisment:
If you have seen my ped lately you may have noticed all the "www.thepedcrew.20m.com" stickers all over it! This is for a limited time only though, because they are all over the panel I smashed to pieces in my little accident at Halfords carpark, and the panel will be replaced shortly!!! Check it...
The Ped Crew get walkitalkies:
Yesterday, 1st May, the ped crew bought a walkitalkie each!!! Now we can cruise and hurl abuse at each other at the same time!! We even bring them to school and chat to each other in lessons, how sad!!! Check out frequencey 5,25 and tune in to the Ped Crew radio!!! RESPECT
Sparks fly...
Yesterday 14th May, Robin stacked it proper (according to Dave and Kate Ritchie (who is buff?)! After turning of a roundabout he crashed in to a kerb and sparks flew, he then fell of and his ped fell on him, and almost killed himself laughing - shame!!!
Declan finally gets his ped on the road after leaving his lock on and ripping his rear wheel off - nice one!!!
G Mc Gee pulls a wheelie!!!
Today 16th May on the way to Cranbourne I was sitting there at a roundabout waiting to pull out. Picture this: I pull back my throttle and my ped stays still, I give it some more, and my ped backfires (big time). F**k loads of black smoke comes out the exsaust, and my ped jumps forward and the front wheel comes up!!!
Last week (during study leave) me and Robin parked up at Cranbourne... when we went back to our peds Robins had gone!!! Robin looked like he was going to s**t himself and then starts panicing! Everyone starts laughing and points around the corner... somebody had picked his ped up and moved it around the corner!!! Busted.
www.thepedcrew.20m.com gets hacked!!!
If you went on my website today (21st May 2002) you may have noticed that this site had been hacked in to by www.caughtwithyourpantsdown.20m.com, mainly by David Holton. I've just finished changing everything back, so now all thats left to do is to kick Dave's arse!!! This is war, where ever you go, what ever you do, I'm going to be watching you Dave!!! Prepare yourself Dave, because your going to have some BIG surprises!!!
The G vs Dave score currently stands at 7-2 after I stuck 50 L-plates all over his ped and then sent Dave a fake letter from the police telling him that he had been busted for crap driving. What did Dave say, something like: "Oh s**t I've been busted".
G Mc Gee scores a few more points:
Yesterday (24th May 2002), me and Andy crusied up to Oakley after work at 10-00. Driving past Kennet Way park, i saw Dave's ped - what an opportunaty!!! I couldn't resist! I thought I would make a few modifications to his ped! After robbing a traffic cone and sticking it behind his ped, I thought I would treat him to a few layers of heavy duty tape! But the job was only half done. I thought I would also leave my mark by disconnecting his battery and taking out his headlights!!! Then afterwards I opened his boot with my spare key (that I got cut) and left a few objects in there as well. Later that evening... as I was driving past the park again I saw Dave walk up to his ped and thought it was my duty to watch his reaction when he saw his surprise!!! After he took all the tape off and removed the cone, he opened his boot and saw the objects that I had left for him!!! Then he tried to start his bike and there was no power! After working out that the battery had been disconnected, he got it started and saw that his lights were missing!!! Dave I think it is fair to say that I got you like a bitch and the score is now 7-4!!! Only 3 more to go!
Declan's exhaust (or lack of it) has been proving a bit of a pain in the arse for Declan. Not only did Greg H and many other people stack his ped proper, but the exhaust fell off!!! It sounds like a chainsaw and moves like it as well, because it doesn't move at all!!!
Stacks:
In the past few days the weather has been crap, this has been causing a bit of a bitch for the ped crew. First of all I dropped my ped in Oakley while trying to play footy at the same time???! May be nothing to do with the weather, but the scratches on the side look great touched up with paint - NICE!!!
Andy decided to come out with us for the last few days... Maybe he wished he didn't. After coming back from Luke's he was racing towards the junction and stacked hard on some gravel, luckly he kept the bike off the ground... but only a day later he was going round a round-about and his wheels 'slipped out'. Andy was left laying in the middle of the road with his ped on top of him and cars driving around him!!! No body even bothered to stop to see what happened... probably because they have seen him driving before?
Today 7th June 2002 Dave surprised us all, and this dosen't happen often... We were waiting out side the shop when we see the deputy Headboy, Ben Williams on his bike. After laying his bike up against the wall, Dave shouts "I would lock your bike up if I were you, you can't trust people around here"!!! After Ben taking of his speedo he left his lock tied to his bike, but not locked up!!! Dave rushes over while he was in the shop and works out the four-numbered combination of his lock, un-locks it and locks the bike up to the lamp post. Out of the possible 6561 combinations Dave worked it out in 2 minutes. No body could believe it, especially when Ben walked out the shop and realised some prick had locked his own bike up!!! "Told you so" Dave said to Ben!!!
Today (unless you have been going round with your head stuck up your arse) you may have noticed England beat Argentina 1-0. After coming home from Oakley at 10-45, I decided to go home via town (past all the pubs)!!! If you have seen me around you will have also noticed my England flag on the back of my ped!!! Driving through town I had to stop at the traffic lights, then... about 15 pissed up blokes walk next to me and start going crazy about my flag and start singing and cheering!!!
Sparks fly again:
After all my mods on my ped I thought I should kick Fidleybum's arse in a street race! Rolling up to the start I could see there was something wrong with Fidler's stand... We both took off down the road and I was winning all the way, after I had gone through the finish line I turned around and saw Fidler about 3 metres away from the line. His stand hits the ground and wraps around his wheel! Sparks fly everywhere... and Fidleybum I kicked your arse easy - no troubles!!!
A few days a go JJ passed his CBT (f**k knows how though?), he had only been on the road a few days when me, Brad and JJ were crusing around and Brad pulled over... I stopped just in front of Brad, and JJ flys passed smacking Brad's arm and only just missing his ped!!! May we have a new contender for the police points???
The record has been broken, The Ped Crew had seven peds racing through town - RESPECT to the boys...
Robin, Dave, Andy, Beaver, JJ, Brad and me!!!
Leave a message on the new corkboard, find the link on the homepage!!!
Taken from www.freethepens.20m.com:
"Geezer of the week!
This week G is geezer of the week for coming out with me when i got vidlers ped and ragged it round hard. Big up yourself rude boy, boooooooooooooo! Just 4 those of you who don't get the picture - G-string, G?"
Big yourself up Wigster, SAFE!!!
Today Juice passed his CBT and came out on his new Speedfight 2!!! Big up the Speedfight Crew:
Juice, Penny, JJ, Andy, and me!!!
Today, JJ stacked hard - the hardest stack yet!!! While going round a round-about he crashed in to Brad (again!) and stacked it proper, scratching up his Speedfight - harsh one!!!
If you have seen Dave on his ped recently you might have noticed that his headlights aren't working, and he can't be arsed to fix them either, anyway yesterday (15th July) when he was riding home from Oakley in the dark he got flashed by other drivers 7 times - a ped crew record!!! Nice one Dave! That reminds me, talking about flashings - me, Dave and Beaver were cruising around Oakridge when we saw some buff girlz and we all start beeping our horns!!! The next thing we know, one of the girlz starts flashing at us!!! SAFE!
A few days ago Beaver was driving along when his seat fell off - leaving him sat in his boot - HARSH BEAV!!!
Dave tried to beat my record yesterday (see picture) and while he was on his way to the petrol station he run out of petrol leaving him pushing his ped to the garage!!!
Poo-stains has finally invested in a brand new Speedfight 2 - SAFE, but failed his CBT - HARSH!!!
|
